OK, I drove my wife to work this morning so I could use her truck. She didn’t know it but me and my pal Rusty went deer hunting today. It’s not exactly deer season but we know where a bunch of deer live by the river where we fish so we just drove on out there and sure enough there was a big old doe there eating grass by the boat launch so Rusty takes out his 30.06 and drops her like a bag of hammers! We were celebrating with a few beers when we got to thinking what if a game warden is waiting to check out truck when we leave? So instead of putting the deer in the bed of the truck we just stuffed her on the floor in the back seat (its a big 2008 Dodge crew cab truck). Then we just covered her all up with our coats and stuff and drove on home. Well, when we get to Rusty’s house and pull out the deer we see that it bled all over the back seat and carpet. Like gallons of it. Now what do I do? I tried washing it out with Dawn and a garden hose but the floor was filling up with water. So I grabbed a big hole-punch and a hammer and knocked a bunch of holes in the floor so the bloody water would drain out. Now its soaking wet and smelly and all stained with blood. One of her friends dropped her off after work so she ain’t seen the truck yet. She’s normally pretty laid back cause she knows how I am and all but she’s nuts about her truck. Do you think she’ll go postal when she finds out? Should I just spend the night at Rusty’s tonight?
I hope there aren’t any bears where you live, cause you’re sleeping in the truck tonight!
Why on earth didn’t you bleed the thing before you put her in the truck? Even I know to do that!


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